And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
