one might say we're banned from that church
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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