he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
