Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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