DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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