man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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