do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
