very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
