I'm really into asian looking animals
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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