Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Randomize
