shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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