That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
