You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Randomize
