Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
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