what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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