; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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