I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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