Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
