Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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