i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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