YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
