we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
