no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
