why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
