Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
this is an emotional support booty call
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
