the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
