Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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