at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
