you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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