now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
it's like heaven, but drunker
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
