don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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