ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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