This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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