He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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