i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
