dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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