Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize