so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I won't apologize to a one balled man
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
