The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
We are two peas in an std pod
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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