First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
