with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
...so i touched it.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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