I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
of course. lets lasso hookers.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
