Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
