I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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