i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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