Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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