My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
