Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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