You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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