we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
