so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
A bitchslap is in order.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
